I’m just going to say it.
Cheese is exquisite.
Cheese is sinful. Cheese is sublime. Cheese dazzles tastebuds and nourishes dreams. And, while it might not always love me back, I love cheese with my whole heart[1], until death do us part, forever and ever amen.
While perhaps not entirely a meal in and of itself, a little creativity and an explorative palate easily launch this infamous dairy queen past traditional culinary boundaries. Indeed, various cheeses are popularly used in appetizer plates to provide rich tasting options, and charcuterie boards have only grown in popularity in recent years. And, with conventional dining options hitting somewhat of a pandemic-produced pause, it never hurts to think outside the box and stray from your dairy comfort zone: Especially when it comes to exploring local cheesy offerings.
Not only does this proposed tour-de-cheese provide in-home entertainment and expand your regionally-specific milky horizons, but it also helps local farmers and cheese artisans during this time of great economic uncertainty. In a recent study 58% of surveyed cheesemakers reported a decline in overall sales. Ultimately then, by sourcing your cheese locally you both sample native flavors and support the vibrant yet often precarious artisan cheese culture. Sounds like a “gouda” deal to me[2].
To curate our own Minnesota-inspired charcuterie board, Cam and I hit up our local Whole Foods for a deep dive into the good stuff. While Whole Foods might not initially sound like the natural starting point for a dairy-inspired adventure, it actually offers quite a robust selection of cheese—both regional and imported. In fact, the grocer even goes so far as to establish a dedicated “Cheese Department” in each store that features an “exclusive selection of cheese passionately sourced from farmers and producers around the world.”
Whole Foods doesn’t dally with your typical Kraft American Singles, and it has the trained specialists to prove it. Yep, you heard that correctly: The national grocery giant employs over 300 Certified Cheese Professionals (CCP) to help you fulfill your wildest dairy dreams during even your most ordinary shopping experience. These connoisseurs often have direct experience in celebrated cheese meccas like France and Spain, and with a certification that represents the highest level of expertise in the industry, they carefully assist you with everything from sampling flavors, to cutting quantities to exact specifications, to planning the ultimate cheese plate for your next get-together[3]. The Cheese Department claims, “Creamy Brie, aged Gouda, nutty Gruyère? You name it — we have it. Think of us as your specialty cheese shop.” I’ll take your “curd” for it, Whole Foods: Consider it done.
For the charcuterie board-building novice, CCPs recommend planning for 1-2 ounces of cheese per person[4] and choosing 3-4 different varieties that cover a range of milks, styles, and textures. To make it even easier, they suggest breaking your cheeses into four distinct quadrants: Soft & buttery, firm & nutty, aged & savory, and blue & tangy[5]. In addition to your dairy, these experts advise you also choose corresponding flavors that are crunchy, fruity, briny, and meaty[6]. While I am eternally “grateful” for this advice, Cam was a little hesitant on the “soft & buttery” prospects, so after perusing our numerous options we settled on Eichten’s Habanero Gouda (MN), Eichten’s Smoked Gouda (MN), Roth’s GranQueso Reserva (WI), Hook’s 5-year Cheddar (WI), and Caves of Faribault’s St. Pete’s Select (MN)[7]. With this assortment we hit the firm & nutty, aged & savory, and blue & tangy benchmarks and were eager to indulge in some home tasting fun!
Because I’m always a sucker for a good story, I was curious to learn more about each of the cheeses we sampled. In fact, sometimes a little background context can go a long way, and we peppered our research in between bites so that it became part of the flavor profiles themselves. Needless to say, we learned a lot: Let’s start with the gouda.
Eichten’s Habanero Gouda – Center City, Minnesota
Whole Foods describes this as a “nutty and mild cheese” with a HOT spicy kick, and the description surely does not disappoint. Since 1976 Mary and Joe Eichten have produced quality artisan cheese made with cow’s milk from the family farm. All cheese is hand-made in an open vat that is identical to the ones used throughout Europe, and you can almost taste the careful homemade love and attention. This particular variety was spicy and utterly captivating in a wholly unexpected way, and we simply couldn’t get enough of it.
Eichten’s Smoked Gouda – Center City, Minnesota
Hailing from the same craft cheese maker as our Habanero Gouda, this cheese featured mild and creamy flavors with a show-stopping smoky presence. While the crafting of this particular cheese is similar to its spicy counterpart, it’s worth noting the Eichtens age their cheese for more than 60 days to evoke those strong natural flavors that come out so vividly. Eichten’s goudas went two for two, and we were happy to have sampled multiple offerings from the same local cheesemaker. I highly recommend giving it a try. Plus, check out Mary: She’s just so stinking cute!
Roth GranQueso Reserva – Monroe, Wisconsin
In “queso” emergency, it’s good to know this cheese is readily available right over the Wisconsin border. Energized by its European roots, Roth specializes in Swiss-inspired alpine-style cheeses, Dutch-style Gouda, Havarti, and several in-house American originals. Roth cheeses have won over 200 awards and are crafted with some of the best milk “America’s Dairyland” has to offer. This Wisconsin take on a Spanish classic (Manchego) has a firm body and is particularly rich and flavorful. With one bite its sharp, salty flavor brings me back to my semester studying abroad in Toledo, Spain: ¡Qué bien!
Hook’s 5-Year Cheddar – Mineral Point, Wisconsin
Everyone knows you need a classic “yellow orange” cheddar to round out the cheesy mix! Tony and Julie Hook have been crafting cheese for over 30 years in their happy patch of southwestern Wisconsin. This 5-year cheddar variety is made in 5-pound blocks and develops its rich, complex flavors over time. The effect is an extra sharp initial punch with a full, robust aftertaste.
Caves of Faribault’s St. Pete’s Select – Faribault, Minnesota
It’s pungent. It’s sharp. It’s moldy. It’s messy. And yet: I’m pretty sure blue cheese is my love language. Created in Faribault in the 1930s, America’s first cave-aged blue cheese is still made with the same techniques, which involve using raw cow’s milk and aging the blue goodness in hand-dug sandstone caves. Wheels of St. Pete’s are hand-selected during each of the four grading steps, and then cave aged for an impressive 100+ days. This blue cheese has been described as “complex and complicated, yet delightfully intimate” and my tastebuds couldn’t agree more.
While this activity wasn’t overtly inventive and didn’t recreate the wheel, we made an extraordinary evening out of the seemingly ordinary cheese selecting and tasting process. There’s something to be said for a slow, savory Saturday at home, and if you can spend it learning new facts about your region, supporting local farmers, sampling new flavors, and slowing down with a good bottle of wine? Well, then I say: It doesn’t get any “cheddar” than that.
[1] See: “Blue Bell” Classics + New Frozen Favorites.
[2] Buckle up: This post you’re in for a whole lot of stinky cheese puns. And I’m not even sorry about it.
[3] They can even recommend corresponding accoutrements and make wine pairing suggestions — so you can act as a cheese aficionado with minimal effort and a whole lot of panache.
[4] A little factoid Cam and I conveniently bypassed for the sake of cheesy adventure. Who needs portion control, anyway?
[5] Mmm: My favorite!
[6] Mmm: My other favorite!
[7] Okay, so we didn’t end up staying entirely within Minnesota. But for being located next to “America’s Dairyland,” can you really blame us?
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