WTF: What the “Fern?”

We could all use a little more green in our lives.

If you’re anything like me, then you already have a serious itch for spring but inevitably suffer a continual bout of cognitive dissonance because—in your heart of hearts—you acknowledge that it’s still January and winter has only just begun[1]

And, while your logical side knows this to be true, the reality is you still encounter spring at every turn:  Spring is in the stores, it’s in the emerging fashions, and it’s in the hopeful vacation plans we make in the dregs of winter.  Thoughts of spring even pervade this surprisingly mild Midwest winter we are having where temperatures are “cold” but not truly “cold.” 

With all this confusion, with all these mixed messages, what are we—those who yearn for spring in hopeful earnest—to do?

Surround ourselves with more green, for starters.

Plants are scientifically proven to help decrease stress, increase productivity, reduce sickness, calm anxiety, clean the air, help reduce noise levels, and boost creativity. 

There’s just something about plants that is good for the soul.  Truly, plants possess a certain curative power that can help transform a gray, mundane winter morning into a day filled with energy, optimism, and possibility if we can learn to view the world from green-colored glasses.

Recently my friend Dixie and I have been on a plant binging spree.  It all started two weekends ago when we went to Bachman’s to purchase a fiddle-leaf fig.  If you have been on the internet in the last several years, then you may recognize that this plant has recently risen from near obscurity to immense popularity.  Indeed, in many ways the fiddle-leaf fig has (quite seriously) become the “it” plant of the design world.  From traditional to modern to farmhouse aesthetic, this plant has defined itself as the “secrete sauce” of creating and maintaining beautiful spaces. 

With this on her mind, Dixie knew she wanted to purchase a tree of her own, and we agreed that a cold, gloomy Saturday afternoon was the perfect day to pull the trigger.  We spent an inordinate amount of time roaming the greenhouse and browsing Bachman’s various eye-catching displays[2] before finally honing in on Dixie’s tree of choice.  Wanting to get in on the fun, I selected a wacky-looking snake plant I had fallen in love with earlier[3], and together we left the warm confines of the greenhouse, braved the cold, and loaded our green pirate booty into the trunks of our cars so we could bring our new babies home.

Since that fateful day, we’ve both had plants on the brain.  You know you’re an adult[4] when you and your friend spend entire evenings texting back and forth about the amount of sunlight that comes through your East-facing windows and the Mealybugs that have suddenly appeared overnight.  Did I purchase well-draining soil?  Is my plant too close to the window?  Am I watering too much?  Am I watering too little?  These are the new questions that plague our minds, and for every question that appears, a Google search and robust text conversation follows.

I will be the first to admit that, at this rate, I am quite seriously in danger of becoming a certified “plant lady.”  And, at the same time, I’m not sure I entirely care. 

What can I say?  Green things make me happy.

In an effort to stoke this newly emerging obsession, last weekend Dixie and I agreed to explore Tonkadale, critically-acclaimed greenhouse in the western suburbs of Minneapolis.  Tonkadale is famous for its extensive selection of plants and flowers, and its mission is to “to enrich lives by creating plant-inspired experiences [in an effort to] connect everyone to beautiful spaces[5].”  Dixie has followed the greenhouse on Instagram for a while now, and given our newfound devotion to all-things-green, we decided to make a Sunday afternoon of it.  We even managed to bring the guys along with the promise of post-plant-shopping beer.  Certainly, we were in for an adventure!

Not quite knowing what to expect, we descended upon Tonkadale with open minds and unfiltered excitement.

Once we walked through the doors we were utterly blown away.   

Stepping into Tonkadale is like stepping into spring; the colors and textures dazzle you immediately, and the atmosphere of light and warmth brightens your spirits and buoys your soul. 

In addition to offering a wide variety of plants, Tonkadale boasts an impressive collection of unique pots, vases, and other plant-themed home accessories.  Strolling through each section heightens your senses in a highly restorative way, encouraging you to slow down, breathe more deeply, and view the world from a slightly different perspective.

From spikey succulents, to aromatic lemon trees, to ferns with bad hair days, we saw it all, delighting in the fact that each turn offered something wholly new, other, and unexpected.  It was as if by moving from aisle to aisle we were traveling to an entirely new region, evading all constraints of geography and space.   

As we perused plants, we even encountered a few additional surprises when two barn cats made unexpected guest appearances.  Cam and Patrick—both vet students—jumped all over this, and they could not stop tracking the cats’ every movements and following them around the greenhouse, joking “let’s scruff ‘em” and “wanna practice a quick neuter?[6]”  Pat even tried to create a fictitious “contest” where guests who found all the cats during their visit won a free plant upon leaving[7].

In a way, our visit to Tonkadale felt like a retreat, a mini vacation bottled into a few hours of an otherwise ordinary afternoon where time stopped, light illuminated the world, and plants bloomed in perpetuity.

This is the power of green.  Though plants be but little, they are fierce[8], and they have a profound impact on both mental and physical health.  Whether you visit Bachman’s, stroll through Tonkadale, or browse your own local nursey, surrounding yourself with plants will boost your mood and refresh your spirit.  Join forces with these happy little critters, and you’ll immediately feel the positive effects, I guarantee it.

And then you’ll really be saying:  WTF[9]?  How have I not done this sooner?


[1] *Sigh.*

[2] If you haven’t been to Bachman’s, it’s a Minnesota must-do.

[3] Let’s be real, I couldn’t let her be the only one to make a purchase that afternoon…

[4] *Or maybe even a senior citizen…

[5] How cool is that?!

[6] Oh, the joys of being in public with vet students.

[7] Much to his dismay, no such contest existed.  And, as Dixie and I learned by asking an employee, the entire facility is home to (only) two cats, both of which we found.  But nonetheless those boys kept searching…  Hey, whatever keeps them entertained, right?

[8] I am grossly misquoting Shakespeare here.  Don’t worry, A Midsummer Night’s Dream, I still do love you!

[9] “What the Fern.”  Don’t be crude.

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