Have you ever wanted to try something for a long time only to perpetually – if not indefinitely – put it off? Have you ever pressed “pause” on taking action or trying something new because you’re waiting for the perfect time – that dangerous fallacy that doesn’t actually exist – where suddenly everything will come together, the stars will align, and the world will magically open herself up to you?
I know you secretly answered “yes” to all the above, but don’t worry: You’re not alone. We all do this in some way, shape, or form because, well, it’s an incredibly human thing to do.
And yet here’s the thing: There’s an alternate option, a different way of being. I’m sorry if you haven’t already realized this, but – surprise! – there is no perfect moment and the stars may never actually align. Instead, you need to push yourself to take the leap, you have to decide to start now, and then you simply need to go, putting one foot in front of the other without ever looking back.
Several months ago, Peloton came out with instructor-led Barre classes, and I was immediately excited about them. While I am by no means a Barre “expert” (or even enthusiast, if I’m being honest) while I lived in Tucson I took enough classes at the local gym to be intrigued.
In case you’re unfamiliar, Barre is a type of hybrid workout that combines ballet-inspired moves with elements of Pilates, dance, yoga, and strength training. Most Barre classes incorporate a physical ballet barre and integrate classic ballet moves like pliés, allongées, and arabesques with more static, traditional stretches.
But the real killer part of Barre? It totally kicks your butt. Yes, this type of exercise isn’t particularly cardio-intensive, nor does it require big, sweeping movements, but I’m speaking from experience when I say this: The subtle, seemingly imperceptible movements and pulses you do in Barre class will absolutely wreck your legs and shred your muscles in ways you didn’t even know were physically possible.
You think I’m exaggerating, but I’m absolutely not: After my first Barre class I couldn’t walk for days. Keep in mind, this was during my first year of teaching when I was up on my feet 24/7 corralling high schoolers and trying to keep my head above water, and, as a twenty-two-year-old fresh out of college, I physically couldn’t walk. And let’s be clear, I’m not talking the “my muscles are tight and I feel pretty achy” kind of sore; I’m talking the “I now need to grip the heck out of the bathroom counter and manually lower myself onto the toilet whenever I need to pee, super funsies” kind of sore.
It was that bad.
And yet, I went back to class week after week. Recognizing the workout would be tough, knowing the ballet movements would feel foreign and unfamiliar, and bracing myself for the stiff muscles and two-second turned twenty-minute bathroom trips that were inevitably in my future, I did it anyway. Why? Maybe it’s that I’m secretly sick and twisted, maybe it’s because I liked the quirky cat-lady instructor who led each class wearing bright pink spandex and multiple scrunchies, or likely it’s some combination of both. But I know this for sure: I returned week after week because although Barre was challenging and quite literally hurt every fiber of my physical being, I saw value in the practice of pushing myself outside my comfort zone and was proud of the results I was starting to produce. With each passing class I slowly grew more certain, my legs became less shaky, and my muscles roared a little less loudly when I woke up the following morning. True, it was still difficult, but I was getting physically and mentally stronger in a way I had never felt before.
But back to Peloton. As I said, months ago the fitness company released new Barre content, and although I bookmarked several classes, I perpetually avoided taking them, coming up with every excuse in the book to fend them off. From “I don’t have enough hours in the day” to “I’d rather do this other strength class” to “I don’t have the right equipment,[1]” time and time again I would weasel my way out of just sucking it up, hitting “play,” and seeing what might happen.
But do you want to know the real excuse? I was scared. It had been years since my last Barre class, I knew I would be sore for several days after my return, and I simply wanted to avoid any version of that from happening. I run or ride my bike nearly every single day, and I had convinced myself that if I tried this new exercise, if I actually did the “one thing a day” that scared me, then I wouldn’t be able to continue the other activities I love.
But here’s what I eventually realized: Sometimes we need to go slower so we can get stronger and ultimately go farther. Sometimes we actually need to mix things up and do the things that scare us so we can better excel in all other facets of life.
So, one day I woke up, I chose to let my curiosity override my fear, I decided enough was enough, and I hit that damn “play” button. And do you know what happened?
Absolutely nothing.
Well, perhaps not nothing. During the twenty-minute class I certainly broke a sweat, my legs definitely wobbled, and absolutely every muscle in my legs screamed bloody murder under the pressure of the intense heat I was building. And yes, I grunted, cursed, and awkwardly plié-ed my way through the session, but I ultimately made it through to the other side and felt a brimming sense of accomplishment and pride. I did it; after all those months of needless waiting and endless excuse-making I actually did it. And will I wake up tomorrow impossibly sore with exhausted legs that feel two hundred pounds each? One hundred percent. But at least it will be my legs that are sore and not my soul.
So here’s my advice: Don’t “grin and bear” your way through life. There’s simply no use in silently suffering through something that brings you pain or misfortune; life is meant for living, and merely subsisting is a senseless, wasteful practice in insanity. With that in mind, there’s something to be said for taking this expression and turning it – both the language and the sentiment behind it[2] – on its head. What if instead of gritting our teeth, digging our heels into ground, and bullheadedly charging our way through life we adopted a new approach that involved pausing, looking deep inside ourselves, identifying the ways we want to challenge ourselves to grow, and then smiling – with profound joy and gratitude as opposed to pain and resentment – out of an appreciation for the ways we are deeply, fully, and authentically living.
So this week I challenge you with this: Reflect on that one thing you’ve been meaning to try for a long time but have consistently put off for a plurality of reasons. Identify it, name it, and then – and this is the crazy, revelatory part – hold yourself accountable to actually, finally go do it. Sure, it may be scary, and sure it may leave you feeling uncertain, questioning, or maybe even sore the next day, but at least you took that first step: At least you tried.
For we don’t get anywhere by sitting passively on the sidelines and simply wishing things were different, and we can only step into the truest, most beautiful version of ourselves when we stand up, confront the things that are difficult, painful, and scary, and then choose to do them anyway.
[1] News flash: You don’t actually need any equipment for Barre.
[2] “Grin and Barre” it, see what I did there?
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